I will most likely not be posting anything on this blog this coming week. I am participating in a writer's retreat, which means I will be fully immersed in my novels. I plan on spending all of the days, and all of the hours, and every minute I am a awake and not showering or eating, working on editing, and writing, and editing, and proofreading, and writing.... so much writing.

I hope that by the end of the week I have between 50-100 pages written, which I know is a hefty goal, and it is also why I will not be posting anything. Nor will I be on social media, or email, or really anything that is distracting. If I do this, I will likely have a complete first draft of my last zombie novel, I will have a complete second draft of the science fiction book I wrote last year, I will have a complete draft of my stupid things people say after someone dies book, and I will have my conversations with my cat book in the proper format for if I have to self-publish it.

After all of this, I may be on lightly, as I have work and a medical issue that I am currently taking care of. I will know more in in the next two weeks about where my life is going, and what I will be doing int he future.

But, before I go, I'd like everyone out there in internet land to wish me luck, as I've never participated in a writer's retreat, and have no idea what to expect. I have also never taken the time to immerse myself in my writing for a week, uninterrupted, 100% of the time.

So, lovely internet people, adieu, see you on the flip side of the week.

I've done it. Yesterday I finished the contest for the month for NaNoWriMo at 50,334, but this doesn't mean I am done writing. I feel both good and bad about it. Why? Let me tell you.

I have been working on a new project this month. It has been wonderful since it has also been a while since I've written, really written. This idea came to me in the form of a book title, and then the first chapter, and then it kept going. I've gotten a little sidetracked in it and it will need some major work, but at least it is something, and it might even, eventually, be something good. It feels good to have written, and most days I actually got 2,000 words, which means it isn't impossible. The problem, or at least what I tell myself is a problem, is that I am also an English Professor, and I often have 2-4 classes of papers I have to grade, and I have to do it in a timely manner. Do you know how hard it is to write and grade papers at the same time? Well, for me it isn't easy because I get so stuck in the editing of everything and making sure my grammar is correct that I don't know what to do.

But, I can do it, if I space things out properly and don't have to grade all of the papers from all of the classes in one week, which I have planned for better this next semester. So I am planning, after this weekend because I need a break from thinking so I can read for a minute, to write every day like I have been, and my continued goal is to write at least 2,000 words, which is not impossible.

I feel bad because I shouldn't have been working on something new when I have the last installment of my zombie series to complete. I know, sometimes as a write you can't help but get sidetracked by an idea, but I have been, and it hurts because I really do want to get this zombie novel out of me, and round out the series. I know where it is going, but I've been having problems getting there, partly because one of my characters is refusing to die, and I need them dead. Now, there is a flip side and a good part! I know I can keep writing, so next week I will be working on both books, it might be one thousand words in one and on thousand in the other, but I can do it. I look forward to doing it.

My new novel might be crap now, and honestly it probably is, I mean no one writes a great novel in the first draft, no matter what they say. There is always editing, and cutting and refurbishing, and if they tell you any different they are entirely full of themselves. Even the greats don't have a perfect first draft, and they are honest about it. I'll keep plugging away, and we will see where it gets me, and we will see if you out there in internet land even likes it, or me!

As a writer I often get wrapped up in books, movies, and the things I am working on. I dismiss or don't always pay attention to those around me. Sometimes I do ignore the suffering of others. It isn't a conscience choice, it is just that I am so in my own head that I forget others exist. I focus on my characters, or the plot trouble I am having, or the fact that I need to design a cover for a story I am about to release.

As a writer of horror I dwell a lot with the darker side of life. I often think about murder and suicide and how to torture someone, either physically or mentally, and it can be mentally exhausting. Sometimes I can't deal with the trouble in the real world because I have been living that day in the mind of a serial killer, or in the mind of a rape victim. I never know what mood I am going to be in at the end of the day, and sometimes I just need a break, so I bury myself in something else and forget again that I have others who depend on me.

As a writer I have come to realize the solitary life I lead. My partner doesn't know what my life is like because they can't see inside my head. Most of my friends don't know that I may be utterly depressed because I just killed a ten-year-old in my book, or because I have been walking through the woods as a serial killer plotting his new life. If someone asks me how my day was, or how it is going, I will always answer that it was fine and everything was fine, because the truth might be so painful it physically hurts me to think about it.

As a writer I am lonely, a lot. I sit at home or at the coffee shop with my notebooks and headphones and listen to whatever music the characters wants while writing down the lives of characters who only exist when I let them out. I try to explain but if I go into detail you, out there in internet land, won't understand. How could you? You don't see what I see. You don't know what is going on in my head. It is a dark place, I live a constant life in a dark place, and yet I function every day, but I still wish that you would ask me out. I don't have co-workers. I don't have an office.

As a writer I know the love of other writers. I know the peace I feel when I am among other people who understand. I know what it feels like to be among people who will listen to the horrors I write and understand that this is what is in my head, it doesn't mean it is me.

As a writer I have been asked some serious and private questions. I wrote a story once about a mother who dumps the abuse and murdered body of the young child she killed. Apparently I described the abuse so well that I was asked if I too was abused. I wrote a story with a rape scene in it that I was asked if I was raped and if I needed to be led to someone to talk to. I wrote a story about burying a loved one and was asked if the story was about me. I just see things, situations, and I see them so clearly that sometimes it hurts. The story about burying a loved one, I actually cried when I wrote it. I cried when I finished it. I cry when I read it. It hurts. It hurts to be a writer, it feels like I'm being cut by a million different razor blades, but it also feel great, it feels like an accomplishment and a relief to get those people and those scenes out of my head.

As a writer I think. I think a lot. I also don't sleep. I have issues with sleep. I have so much I want to get out, and my brain just does not shut up. I should be sleeping now. It is 1am on Friday, July 29, 2016. I don't want to sleep. I have people to let out. I have a story burning in my fingers. A story that begins with, "Holy Shit," she exclaimed when her doctor told her the results. Cancer, again. How many times does one person get cancer. It was almost as if cancer had a revenge pact against her for some reason.

For now, my internet lovelies, I am going to try to sleep. I am going to go brush my teeth and pray that my cat makes it through one more night. I have been praying this a lot. I am going to hope that my partner has a great, accident free drive to work tomorrow. I am going to pray that I wake up feeling rested and am able to get to work on this story while it is burning so brightly in my brain.

I just wanted you, out there, to know what life is like, as a writer.

I just returned from the AWC writer's conference in Birmingham and I have to say it was very enjoyable. Not only did I meet several new and known awesome authors, but I learned a lot.

I attended several classes such as: Editing, The "me" in Memoir, Blogging, Creative Non-Fiction, and Taking the Mystery out of Mystery. First I have to say that the editing class was very well done, although I wish it was a little less about poetry and expanded a little more on how to work on prose. There were several poets there so I am assuming they found this more helpful than I did, even though I found it very helpful.

The Memoir class was great for all writers, not just memoir writers. It had a lot of information on how to strengthen a scene and how to put yourself into a scene (which in turn will put your readers in the scene and make the scene more powerful.

Creative Non-Fiction wasn't as helpful as I would have liked. The man teaching the class talked more about his own career in journalism and the Pulitzer prizes he won rather than what made creative non-fiction and how to write creative non-fiction. It was not he best class and I felt like I learned very little since I walked away still wondering what the heck creative non-fiction is.

Taking the mystery out of mystery was very interesting. I didn't realize there were as many subgenres of the mystery genre as there was. And I will be honest I had no idea what the hell "cozy" mysteries were, nor did I realize that they even existed. It was a very informative class and I think I may look more into the mystery genre.

All in all I really enjoyed this conference and I hope to be free to go next year. I met some of the most awesome people. I learned a lot. And right now I am working on several stories including the last zombie book.
 
And in the zombie arena I will have a free story at the end of this month, it goes between books three and four and involves a very minor character from book 3 ZOMBIE WASTELAND.

I will be out of touch for a few days because I am off to a writer's conference. I have decided not to take my computer, instead I am going old school and am going to take notebooks to work on my book in. One of the reasons I am not taking my computer is because I don't plan on worrying about plugging it in and taking care of it, plus it isn't a small one and weights a little bit. Realistically, I don't want to carry the damn thing around. I will update things when I get back.

I will continue to keep track of my playlist, and I will tell anyone interested what the conference was like, and what I learned.

This is just a little update. Why? Because you, out there in internet land, might be interested in some of the things a writer does.

I just finished my first round of edit on a new zombie story which will be released at the end of this month. It goes between the third book, ZOMBIE WASTELAND and the fourth book, ZOMBIMERICA. I am not yet sure what I will call it, but the main characters are the zombies. If anyone has any suggestion I am open and if I use your title I will of course give you credit, so blow me away!

I have some titles in mind, but nothing seems to work. So I am asking you, my internet beauties to help an author out. If I don't use any of your suggestions for this story, I will keep a file of them in case they work for a future story...or even a future book.

On another note, I am continuing to work on book four. I apologize for not updating the playlists every day but I haven't always been able to write them down as I have been distracted by actually writing. I will try to have some in the next week or two, because I feel that if I share them with you I am inviting you to be a part of the writing process with me.

When writing from a zombies point of view what would you listen to dear internet reader? Today this was just the question, what do I listen to when writing from a ten year old zombies point of view, and yes, she is much wider than most living ten year old's.

This is what happened when I let her choose my music:

Mother by Danzig
Blood Pressure by Mutemath
Cry Little Sister by G Tom
Ladies of the World by Flight of the Concords
Cradle of Love by Billy Idol
Dragula by Rob Zombie
Fuck You by Cee Lo Green
Back to Black by Amy Winehouse
They Won't Go When I Go by George Michael
Dirty Paws by Of Monsters and Men
Chop Suey by System of a Down
Left Hand Free by alt-J
The Nights by Avicli
In The Air Tonight by Phil Collins
Far From Any Road by The Handsome Family


Then I lost my train of thought so only 1640 words down today, but again that is better than zero. So I am on my way to getting book 4 ZOMBIMERICA done. I'm working on the free story that goes between books 3 and 4, which is good for you out there in internet-land. Plus, in September and October I have evens in Huntsville, Alabama where I will be selling myself, signing books, and basically pimping zombies. So look for more information on those events, coming to this blog near you soon.

I was in a mood today, writing from an emotionless teenage girls point of view. I know, that is probably an unrealistic character, but if you grew up with no family and zombies were an every day part of life, you might be emotionless too. Anyway, I digress, I liked this playlist so I decided I'd post it today.

Meet Virginia by Train (I played this one 4 times because it just worked for me)
Sounds of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel
Take Me to Church by Hozier
Do I Wanna Know by Arctic Monkeys
Something to Believe In by Poison
Praying for Time by George Michael
Africa by Toto
Strange Fruit by Billie Holiday
Wind of Change by Scorpions
Waiting by George Michael
One More Try by George Michael
Mother by Lissie
Blaze of Glory by Bon Jovi
Another Day In Paradise by Phil Collins (don't judge)
Oh Father by Madonna
Hey You by Pink Floyd
Skyfall by Adele

And that is where we will end for the day.

2,260 words written in an hour and a half. Not bad, not bad at all for someone who has been dealing with severe writer's block

I am a busy girl for the next month and a little bit. I have the luck of playing Verges in Rocket City Shakespeare's production of MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING. The character is a little kooky, which is my favorite part of him. People ask if I want to be an actor, I say not really. I just want to have fun and maybe act. I've been enjoying it, and in all honesty I would much rather be a small character than a headlining one...too many lines to learn. If one came along and I was offered a main part, sure I'd do it, I'd also go totally insane. Here is the information, if you are in the area come see me. In fact try to come on the 28th to celebrate my birthday. If you can't make it then, you can try the 29th and celebrate another actor's birthday!

Towards the end of May I plan on taking a little vacation. The vacation will take me to the Stanley Hotel. I am so super excited to go there. I have never been and have wanted to check it out for a while. While I know that there are a lot of people who think it isn't really haunted because it's just a story, and I don't care if it is or not. I just want to visit a nice and fancy hotel. It reminds me of this hotel called the Madonna Inn in San Luis Obispo, California. I just hope the food is good.

On a last note, I am continuing to work on writing a little. Still trying to push through the writer's block I have been dealing with, and I am getting through it slowly. Hopefully, by the end of next month I have a finished story because I really need to get back to the final installment in my zombie books.